Sin is so Ugly...Grace is so Beautiful.

Life is very hard...for everyone. But some have it very, VERY hard. Often it is a result of poor decisions they have made...and continue to make. Sin is the ultimate root of all the "kaka" in this world. It's so ugly and destructive...it's a cancer that never goes into remission. It has to be cut out, aggressively treated and considered enemy #1.

I see my own sinfulness and it's scary. I have a darkness and depravity inside of me that is capable of the most hideous things. It's there, lurking and waiting for an opportunity to attack, to kill with my words, to abuse, to slander, to chew up and spit out anyone and everyone. It's shaking a rebellious fist to God, cursing and mocking Jesus on the cross, hell-bent on destruction. That ugliness, that corruption, that disease is in me and in every person who has ever lived and will ever be born. No wonder this world is so disgusting and utterly vile. No wonder it is so repulsive to Holy God. How amazing is His grace in comparison to the ugliness of this world! How inconceivable that You, Father, would sacrifice Your perfect and sinless Son for such a wretched people...that you would die for me.

Amazing grace! How sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me!
I once was lost, but now I'm found.
Was blind but now I see.

I cannot express the depths of gratitude I have for You, God. I could try, but my words fail. Praise You! Thank You! Bless You! I worship You and You alone. You are God! There is none like You...no one above You! Who am I to even speak to You? To look towards You and have You acknowledge my pitiful life.

Why would the Creator God, beyond my mind's ability to conceive, God of the universe and beyond...why would this God have anything to do with man? We have rejected Your love. We have killed Your Son. We have mocked You and led a rebellion against You. Why do you bother with us? You don't need anything from us. You are resplendent and self-sustaining. You never lack anything or have need. Yet You went so far for us "mudballs." What kind of love is this? I cannot fathom Your love. Apart from You I would cease to be. You chose to reveal Yourself to man...to me...for Your good pleasure. All I can do is fall on my face and wallow in Your grace. Your holiness incinerates me...except for Your grace.